Episode 33 Show Notes

Building Your Sales Confidence and Muscle to Improve Sales Conversations

Selling is the lifeblood of your business and, as such, you shouldn’t feel like it’s boring and uncomfortable. Rather, think of it as getting your work into the world. Thus, the importance of improving your sales conversations.

We like to define the process of selling as getting to know other people and exploring their needs to serve them at the highest level. And sometimes, this doesn’t really involve them buying your product.

In this episode, our sales expert Jane Garee dives more into what selling is and what is not to help us change our perception about sales conversations and become better salespersons ourselves. 

Today we discuss:

  • [01:23] Building your sales muscle. What is selling and what isn’t? 
  • [10:24] Changing your perception of selling. Understanding the process of selling.
  • [13:01] Myth of selling we need to debunk. #1: You don’t have to be good at closing the sale.
  • [21:45] Myth of selling we need to debunk. #2: You don’t always have to make an offer
  • [31:09] A sales conversation’s objective is to get to the truth.
  • [40:11]  Myth of selling we need to debunk. #3: Your client don’t care about you, they care about the benefits your services can provide.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

To complement all of Jane’s tips to improve sales conversations, we encourage you to listen to episode 25, where we talk about the importance of focusing on outcomes instead of deliverables. 

This will help you create a solid selling strategy that leaves you and the people you are selling happier.

If you want to know more about how to improve your selling conversations, head over to Showstopping Sales. Jane has some great resources there!

Don’t forget we have a free assessment to test if your mindset corresponds to that of a CEO. It’s simple, do you think like a CEO?

Take our free assessment now and find it out! 

Thank you for listening to this episode of Flourish+Grow to CEO! We hope it has changed your perception of selling, and that you can start having richer, funnier, and valuable selling conversations from now on!

Don’t forget to rate and subscribe to this podcast on the platform you prefer and leave us a comment in the comment section telling us what was your favorite part from today’s episode. We would love to hear from you!

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Pam (00:20):

Are you a lady boss making 50 to a hundred thousand in your business, and you’re ready to break through that six figure barrier.

Jane (00:28):

Have you done a great job of creating a nice life as the ultimate gig master, but no, your inner CEO is calling you to greater Heights. You’re in the right place. If you want to create and implement solid fundamentals in your business without sacrificing five

Pam (00:42):

I’m Pam Ivey, I’m certified in small business management. And I concentrate in the areas of training and certifying real estate assistance, coaching and mentoring entrepreneurs in online business, marketing growth and profit acceleration. And I take men and women business owners aged 40 plus two bucket list destinations around the world for a month at a time to work, explore, and live in community.

Jane (01:08):

And I’m Jane Garee known as the sales strategist for the non sales person. And I work with business owners who want to increase their conversion rate, shorten their sales cycle and have more impact and influence with the work they do all while having more fun with selling.

Pam (01:23):

Hey everyone. And welcome back to the flourish and grow to CEO podcast. Today. You have just Jane. Hey Jane. Hey everybody, you were you sleeping there and Pam, uh, no interview for you today is just gonna be us chatting. It’s so nice to get back to this. It’s been quite a while. You know, we’ve been absolutely inundated, which is really exciting for us with a request to be guest on our show. So that’s why we’ve been having so many interviews lately. There’s just been so many interesting people to talk to, but we thought we’d get back to just Jane and Pam. So today we’re going to be talking about building your sales, confidence and muscle. And of course we know that Jane’s going to be doing most of the talking on this because well, that’s her specialty. So, you know, with that said, Jane, why don’t you jump right in?

Jane (02:20):

Yeah, absolutely. So selling it is my specialty. It is my love. It is my passion. It is my career of choice and has been since the first lemonade stand I had and then selling shoes at the mall. And then after graduating from college, getting, getting sales jobs in bigger corporations. So very, very passionate about this topic. So the first thing I really want to do is just set this up for everybody and talk a little bit about what selling is and what it is not. And I like to start out with this because sales has gotten such a bad rap over the years, it has become the thing that you don’t want to do. That the slimy salesperson, the cheesy sales person, the manipulative salesperson sales people and selling in general just can have a really negative connotation to it. But some of you are probably going, yup, preach it, sister and others of you are like, well, I really, I really think sales are great.

Jane (03:19):

I really think selling is great. So that’s good. So for those of you who are still, aren’t loving the whole sales concept, I hope to shift your mind by the end of this. And for those of you who do what sales and you, you understand its place in the world, you think it’s good. I hope that you have the beginnings of a love affair with this in a way that you haven’t experienced before. So what is selling? So what’s selling is it’s, it’s really the way in which you get your word, your work out into the world, your words also, but it’s the way in which you get your work out into the world. Selling also provides what your clients want and need. So it actually improves their lives or, and or their businesses. And then selling is also it’s the lifeblood of your business.

Jane (04:03):

No sales means no money means no business and businesses. Number one goal is to be profitable, which means it has to generate revenue, which is just a fancy way of saying money’s coming in. And how does money come in when things are sold? So selling is the way you get your work out into the world. It provides what your clients want need. So solutions, so that improves their lives or businesses. And it is the lifeblood of your business. Now here’s what selling, isn’t it, isn’t some thing that you have to do to people to make sure that you make money selling is also not some persona that you have to become, meaning you are a different person when you’re in the sales role than you are when you are the business owner, or even if you’re any different. When you are being a friend or a wife or a parent or a sister or whatever it is, you don’t put on a costume and play a character.

Jane (04:58):

When you’re selling, you should always be your authentic self and finally selling. Isn’t a necessary evil that has to happen in order for you to move your business forward. So I really want to dispel all of those myths. I truly believe that selling is a very noble profession. And the reason I believe it is a noble profession is because it serves people at the highest level. And I want you to think about this whenever you have been a consumer, because we’ve all been consumers or customers or clients at some point. So if you can, I want you to conjure up in your mind the last time you invested in something, or you bought something, so it could be a service or it, or a good or a trinket or a toy or a house, or as big as small as you want. But I want you to think of the last time that you invested in something, or you bought something and it made you really happy.

Jane (05:52):

Maybe it just made you happy because it was silly. And it was happy for the sake of happiness, a great pair of shoes at handbag, something like that. Maybe it made you happy because it was the realization of a dream, a home, a car, a vacation, the point that I’m making is somebody sold you that. So when you think about the thing that you bought or that you invested in and the good feelings are coming up for you and you’re happy, or you’re proud, or you’re so grateful that you purchased or invested in this thing, I’m pretty certain you’re not sitting there saying, I can’t believe that nasty salesperson pushed this on me. Salespeople just want to make money, but you’re not doing that. And so this is really the essence of what is on the other side of selling a happy customer who was more than willing to invest or spend money in this service or good, because they knew that they wanted it, it made them happy. It provided a solution, it improved their life or their business. That really is the essence of selling. And when you do that, you are absolutely serving people at the highest level.

Pam (07:05):

I absolutely love Jane that you brought up the point that you don’t have to take on a certain persona to do sales. Cause I know when I first started my business way back when, um, I used to be so professional, you know, on sales calls kind of stiff and stuff, that’s not who they worked with. Cause as you guys know, I’m bubbly kind of fun, pretty laid back. So it was incongruent. That’s a really big word for me today, um, with really who they were getting in the end. And I found once I got more relaxed and became myself, sales were fun. They weren’t, oh my God, this thing I have to do and I have to be professional. And I’m so scared. And they were really fun because I was just having conversations.

Jane (07:54):

Yeah, absolutely. And if you’re somebody who’s very naturally kind of buttoned up and a little bit more corporate, they can be fun that way too, but you’re bringing up a really good illustration or illustrative point Pam, and that you just need to be who you are. And I’ve seen more people get themselves into trouble and lose business because they had this story in their head that they had to be a certain way in a sales conversation. And funny enough, it runs the gamut on both sides of, of extremity there. So if you’re somebody who’s kind of bouncy and super casual and, and just sorta talks to people and like, hang out, that’s really how I am. And that’s really how I am for the most part of my sales conversations. And it’s not lacking professionalism. It’s just, it’s, it’s a very lighthearted way of being and sort of bouncy and in the moment.

Jane (08:43):

And, and I’m not real, you know, I’m chill and I’ll say things like we can chill and you know what shaken and I’m. So I usually very, very informal is really how I go through most of my life, including a sales conversation. So for me to turn into something, that’s into some kind of person that’s very, very stiff and all of a sudden I’m, um, corporate speaking and I’m, I’m putting a tamp down on my personality. It will come through because I’m, I’m in a place now of inauthenticity and it happens on the other side. So people who tend to be a little more formal, a little more buttoned up, they’re a little more corporate. They, they just have a way of being, that’s comfortable for them where it’s not super cache and all happening and what’s up and, you know, preach it sister or whatever kind of thing, which I’ve seen plenty of people do in sales conversations very, very effectively, but they aren’t those people.

Jane (09:31):

And I have seen them derail themselves and the conversation because they feel like they have to be more charismatic or, or more impassioned by what they’re saying in a, in a way that’s funny or they’re artificially charming. And so the worst thing you can do is have an expectation of yourself to be anybody other than who you are. Your super power is actually who you are. And the biggest thing that you can bring into a sales conversation is your full personality, who you are down to the core being completely authentic, being completely genuine in how you show up by just being yourself.

Pam (10:12):

Yeah. I really liked that your super power is who you are. I think we should put that on t-shirts actually. Yeah, I like that.

Jane (10:24):

Right. A little bit more deeply about what selling is. So selling is simply a process of discovery and matchmaking. It’s an exploratory conversation. You are trying to determine whether this person has a problem that you can solve, whether you are the best person to solve that problem. And this is kind of track with me here, because this is going to be interesting and new for some people. If you actually have the chemistry to work with each other, this is really important in any business. That’s very, service-related. So unlike having a little bit of leeway, if you’re selling a product, you could sell the product, the person buys the product. And then in the future, if the person needs anything or has questions, they’re probably going to get rerouted to not, you, they’re going to get rerouted to customer service. The manufacturer, I don’t know, you know, there’s a million different places they could go.

Jane (11:18):

But if the coffee mug breaks other than contacting the sales person to maybe get a new one, they’re not going to call you to get it fixed or whatever the case may be in the service-based industry, though, the chemistry between you and your prospective client is really important because you are going to be in a relationship with that person for some period of time. And you do not want to see this person showing up on your caller ID and groaning or showing up in your email inbox and rolling your eyes and going, what does she want today? You don’t want to experience any of that. So number one, does this person have a problem that you can solve? Number two, are you the best person to solve the problem? Because frankly, sometimes you’re not. And that’s okay. And I’ll talk about that in a minute.

Jane (12:04):

And number three, is the chemistry good enough? Or really? I don’t even like good enough. Is the chemistry good? Are you all going to be able to live with each other and interact with each other in partnership, in relationship for a specified amount of time? So selling a process of discovery and matchmaking. Now this is going to lead right into what I always talk about as being, in my opinion, the top three myths of selling and these myths will hold you back. And it’s actually a disservice to your prospective clients. So when you get bogged down in anyone or more of these three myths, not only are you not having good conversations, you’re probably not getting clients because the whole thing is just off. You’re up in your head with a story. They’re feeling it. And guess what? You basically have become a salesperson put on costume assume position, and you just don’t ever want to do that.

Jane (13:01):

You want to be fully who you are and you’re going to explore. Okay. So myth number one, myth. Number one is that you have to be good at closing and we have all grown up on this, especially if, um, uh, for our clients are all probably of a certain age, right? So that whole coffee’s for closers. And there’s no such thing as bad leads, only bad salespeople. So there’s been this, this pressure to be really, really good at closing. Did you close? Did you close ABC always be closing. Did you close? Always be closing? And I just want people to check that out the window and not worry about that anymore, because when you go in worrying about whether or not you’re going to close, it creates artificial pressure. It puts pressure on you. It puts pressure on your prospective client and you’re, there you go.

Jane (13:45):

Your whole conversation now has become a pressure cooker instead of a exploratory conversation. So to frame this up, I like to talk about the difference between an objective and a goal. And this is where most people get tangled up in a lot of things, but especially in a sales conversation, this is the dictionary definition of both an objective and a goal. So I’m gonna start with the goal. First, a goal is what is accomplished at the end of something. It’s a final result. An objective is the thing that you do, or a series of actions that you take in order to reach the goal. So for example, if I have a goal to lose 10 pounds in the next six weeks, that is my goal. That is the end result. That is the thing that I’m striving for. However, that is not my objective. If I get up every day and say, today, I’m going to, uh, today, I’m going to remind myself that my goal is to lose 10 pounds where the little Debbie snack cakes for lunch, not good, right?

Jane (14:48):

I’m focusing on the goal, the objectives, that’s what I need to be paying attention to. So the objectives every day would be, did I eat and track my nutrition? Did I get in my strength training? Did I do my cardio? Did I journal my emotional eating habits or whatever the case may be? So there are things that I’m doing and I’m meeting the objectives every day, because I know that the likelihood of achieving my goal as a result of following the objectives is pretty high. A goal without objectives just really becomes a dream because you’ve got no plan of action behind it. And you have no strategy and you, you, you, you don’t have things that you’re doing. You’re just kind of focusing on the end result. So I can get you tangled up in life because you can’t get up everyday and say, my goal is to lose 10 pounds and I have no objective.

Jane (15:39):

I’ll just go do whatever I want. Or my goal is to build a million dollar business. And so, but today I’m not quite sure what I’m going to do. So focus on the objectives and you should reach your goal. So what is the objective in a sales conversation? So we’re going to toss out the goal. We’re not going to get on the phone or get into a one-on-one consultation with the goal of closing. I got to get this client, I got to get this money. We’re going to just check that out. What we’re going to do from here on, in is we’re going to focus on the objective. So what is the objective? The objective is to facilitate a conversation that is rich, that is deep, that is meaningful, and that requires your prospective client to do some introspection. And so that they get to the truth of whatever the heart of the matter is. That’s really your objective in a sales conversation, you are going to ask questions. You are going to facilitate a conversation so that the other person can move through it with ease, with confidence, with excitement, and with extreme honesty and transparency. And you’re going to help them get clarity around what their truth is.

Pam (16:53):

Hey lady, boss, do you think like a CEO when your business starts taking off, you’re ready to scale up. At this point, you’ve got to stop thinking of yourself as a solo preneur and start thinking of yourself as the CEO of your company. If you remain in the mindset of a one-person operation, then you won’t be able to grow. You’ll never have the time, energy or expertise to do everything by yourself and your business. Won’t be the success that it has the potential to be. So are you thinking like a CEO take our free assessment to find out you can find it@flourish.biz forward slash think that’s F L O U R I S H dot B I Z Ford slash T H I N K. Once again. That’s flourished.biz for slash think. All right, lady boss, let’s get back to the show.

Jane (17:53):

All right. Now you need to make sure that the rich deep thought provoking conversation, that’s allowing your prospective client to do some introspection is about the thing that you’re selling. So that’s why I use the word facilitate. You need to guide the conversation so that the doors you are opening and the truth that you are helping them crack open will lead them to determining whether or not they need to buy the thing or the service that you’re selling. So, as an example, you wouldn’t get into a deep thought provoking introspective conversation about their favorite country in Europe, in depth. If the purpose of the phone calls to determine whether or not they are ready to work with you to lose weight, you probably actually would talk a little bit about their favorite country in Europe to travel to because traveling requires energy and energy requires making sure that your body’s healthy.

Jane (18:47):

And then there you go. So this is kind of the magic of how sales conversations can become very, very fun, because a lot of topics will come up, but you need to make sure that you kind of keep it tight. Otherwise you’re going to be in consultations for hours, you know, because people, especially your ideal clients, they’re really fun. You’re going to fall in love with them. They’re going to fall in love with you, and you can just be talk and talk and talk and talk, and which not a bad thing in and of itself. But remember you are running a business. So you have to make sure is this, am I getting clients today? So kind of advanced training there, I dipped into a little bit where you’re going to go into multiple topics in the sales conversation, but we’re not going to cover all that today.

Jane (19:28):

The point that I want you to know today is your objective in a sales conversation is to get this person to the truth. And you do that by facilitating a conversation where you are asking questions that are uncovering, this person’s need for what it is that you do, or maybe they don’t need what it is that you do. And that’s okay too. But this is why, and it’s, it’s an exploratory conversation. So we’re talking about myth number one, which is you have to be good at closing me bunk on that. Here’s what I want you to think of in terms of stead. And instead of being, I have to be good at closing. I want you to start saying I have to be good at opening. And then to open a space, I’m going to open a conversation. I’m going to be open to receiving what this person is telling me. And I’m going to open a container where my prospective client feels good and ready, and accepted and heard, and loved and seen and understood. And if you do that, you will have more business than you know what to do with. So you are going to get they’re light,

Pam (20:33):

Sorry, jam just like light bulb moment for me there. When you said you don’t have to do the close thing, you have to open big light.

Jane (20:42):

Yeah. Yeah. You have to, you have to open. And if when you get really good opening, the clothes will actually start to take care of itself. In fact, that’s my brand promise in my specific sales training is when you really know how to master a sales conversation, you’ll never have to close again. Your clients, your prospective clients will become your clients because they will ask you for the business in the phone call. How great would that be? So myth, number one, you don’t get good at closing. You get good at opening.

Pam (21:13):

I loved what you said about, you know, they’re, if they’re a great fit for you, great. But if they’re not, that’s okay too. And I think that’s really important because you don’t have to bend a fit to what they need. If you’re not the right fit for each other, you can say, okay, cool. I met a really cool new person today. Refer them on to somebody else and even better the reciprocity thing. Once you refer them onto somebody else, who’s like stellar. And you know, they’d be a great fit. Ask them if they know someone who would be a great fit for you.

Jane (21:45):

Yeah. So the concept that lash is going to go into myth. Number two and myth. Number two is I always have to make an offer and no, you don’t always have to make an offer. In fact, I really want you to start thinking about not making offers. Wait, what do you mean? Hold the phone. What are you talking about? How could I do that? That’s crazy. Yeah, no, it’s not. You, you don’t always want to make an offer. So this is another myth that has, it’s really prevalent. And it, again, it’ll run you off the rails in a sales conversation. So it’s this false belief that because what I do affects other people in a very positive way. And I know, and I believe that the work that I do affects people in a positive way. I need to make an offer to every single person that I talked to.

Jane (22:29):

And nothing could be further from the truth. Number one, they may not actually be a good fit just because you can help somebody. Does it mean that in that moment, it’s, you are what they need. They may need things before they get to you. So the easiest example I use and I do this in my own business is I, I don’t work with people in a sales training capacity. I won’t train people in sales until they have a system and a process where they’re getting at least three to five leads coming in per month. If, if somebody isn’t there, I would much rather them spend their time and their money in investing in how to get a process. So that they’re getting three to five leads coming in per month. So those people don’t get an offer. They’re not ready for me. They want to work with me.

Jane (23:13):

And this is where it gets a little challenging sometimes because I’ve had plenty of people say, but can we do it now? Can we do it now? No. You know, I might, if they really want to shore, then let’s, let’s get you enrolled and we will do it in the future. But it’s with the understanding that you need some things first. So never have any fear around saying now is not the time. And I’m not saying if they’re ready to work with you and you know, and they know, and everybody knows they’re going to need you at some point in the future and it’s going to be good that’s. But if you are even uncertain, if they’re going to need you at all, then you don’t make an offer. And that part isn’t the hard part. So much. The hard part is, and therefore I will not be taking your money, but this is really the difference between business owners who build a business. That’s sustainable with a great reputation. And it continues to grow and business owners who don’t, there’s a lot of power in saying, no, thank you. I’m not the best fit for you right now. And again, that’s absolutely. Yeah. That’ll branch off into a whole different topic. So we want to stay a little tight today, but I really want everybody to hear that.

Pam (24:21):

Absolutely. You know, then what circumstance gives you the best results for your clients? And if it’s not, if they’re not ready for that, then you’re avoiding a whole bunch of things that way, right? You want to create the best experience ever, because then they’re going to tell all their friends, if they’re not ready, they’re not going to get the results that you promise. Correct.

Jane (24:42):

And let me tell you, nobody ever comes back and says, you know, I was, I was doing some introspection and I realized that me working with you is actually premature and shame on me for wanting to go for it. What they say is you talk me into that. I want to, I want to read, or now you’re not going to give me a refund. I’m gonna charge back. And now I’m going to get on social media and tell people that they should work with you. And it’s really unfortunate. It’s just because it’s not even because that person’s not a nice person. It’s their stress. They’re disappointed. They didn’t get results. They invested money in it and it becomes your fault. So let’s circumvent that instead of making it your fault, let’s say, you get, you get, you get the honor, right? You get the honor of working in integrity and saying, you know what, Pam, I hear you right now.

Jane (25:28):

Your business is really new. And you’ve got a lot of exciting things coming up. Let me refer you to a few people that I know, because I’d love to see you get your foundations in place first. And then let’s talk and in about three months and see where you are at that point. That’s running a business. That makes sense. That makes people grateful. As opposed to me, knowing Pam’s not going to need me for a minimum of three months, probably longer, but I want to talk to her in three months just to see where she is. And he’s saying, you know what, Pam, this sounds great. So yeah, let’s go ahead and, and get you signed up for this. So what’s your credit card number? What Pam does it have a business? Her foundations aren’t in place. She doesn’t, she doesn’t need me right now.

Jane (26:06):

She’ll need me soon, but she doesn’t need me right now. So myth number two is you always have to make an offer. I love putting this in the context of dating. So most of our idea, clients are women and women are notoriously awful at doing this. So I’m sure you’re all going to really be able to relate to this story. So your sales conversations are very much like a first date, maybe a second date. So think about this. Think about, for those of you who are married, think about when you went on the first date with your husband and for those of you who are dating, you think about the best date you had with some, some guy, right? I’m talking to one who’s woo. Light you up. Butterflies in the stomach is one of my clients. Who’s a dating and relationship. Coach likes to say, make your panty hose roll up and down metaphorically.

Jane (26:51):

You know, like your eyes are bugging out, Bing, bang, boom. You know, you’re hoping you’re going to go out with them again. What are you saying to yourself in the date? What does he think about me? Does he think I’m pretty? Does he think I’m funny? Does he think I’m charming? Does he think I’m interesting? Oh, I hope he asks me back out again. Oh, I wonder what he’s thinking about me or what or what he’s thinking about me and the better question there is. What am I thinking about him? What do I think about him? Do I think he’s funny? Do I think he’s interesting? Do I think he’s charming? Do I think that it’s worth it for me to go back out on a date? If he asked me out, I’m not sure that’s the purpose of our time together. That is the purpose of our date.

Jane (27:31):

I’m going to see who this man is because what I have to offer is valuable and what I have to offer is it for everybody. I know my value. I know my worth. And I am only going to offer up the opportunity to continue to spend time with me. With someone that I know is going to treat me well, that is compatible. That is a good fit. That’s going to step up and show up so that I’m not in this relationship by myself. This is really effective in dating, as you might imagine. And it’s the same thing in a sales conversation, you don’t bang into a date, desperate, hoping that he’s going to ask you back out because you kind of have this, this, but I want a boyfriend or I want a husband. And it’s the same thing in the sales conversation. You don’t show up going, I really need the money.

Jane (28:23):

I really need this gig because what you’re doing is you’re putting the focus on what do they think about me? And here we go, how can I convince them to say yes to me? So we want to flip that whole narrative. So it’s, what do I think about them? And am I interested in pursuing this partnership? So the power is all you. And if you just do this one mind shift, it will, it will change how you show up in a sales conversation. And as a result, it’s actually going to change whether or not you are having effective conversations that feel good, that are exploratory, and you’re going to be now hitting your objectives. And I can promise you, you’re going to start hitting those goals.

Pam (29:12):

I love it. There was a couple of really big light bulb moments for me there. Um, throughout your whole thing, that thing, uh, that you said that get good at the opening, not the clothes, just like fireworks for me. And then did anybody else have this yummy visual? When Jane said always be closing of Alex Baldwin. And I think it was Glengarry Glen Ross always be closing. That was a very yummy vision for me. Thank you so much.

Jane (29:50):

Maybe we can use it as the prototype for that date where you don’t say, Ooh, what’s Alex. They could be, you go, what do I think

Pam (29:57):

That’s a given, but anyway, but, and your last point that we’re evaluating the situation, not what are they thinking of us? Are they going to be joining us are whatever. That’s a big one to really work on that you guys. Cause I think that’s going to help you so much to really be able to enjoy those sales conversations. They’ll become a lot easier. And I bet you you’ll make more sales.

Jane (30:26):

Yeah. 100% you will because you just, you’re not, you’re not attached to whether or not they say yes because that’s your, your head’s not even in that space. You know? And, and that’s why I love sales so much is because when I look at my calendar and I go, oh, look at all these conversations. What I’m thinking is, huh? Who are these people? What’s their deal? What drives them? What makes them happy? What are they running towards? What are they running away from? I can’t wait to learn more about them. I can’t wait to learn more about their business, if they’re interesting and they have a problem and I have the solution and I think I’m going to be the best person to solve it. Then that excites me because there may be some potential clients in here and there may not, but I’m not going to sweat it.

Jane (31:09):

I’m going to go in and I’m going to have thought provoking, interesting conversations that require them to get to the truth of what it is that they’re actually dealing with. And we’ll go from there. So here’s what I want to say about the truth. I say this all the time, kind of ad nauseum with my clients, but I, it just, it cannot be said enough. So what’s the deal with the truth. Here’s the deal with the truth in that is your number one goal in the sales conversation, it’s to get every it’s to get each person to, as I say, get to the bottom of their nonsense and start telling the truth. So the nonsense would be, let me go back to the weight loss example. The nonsense would be well, you know, it’s really okay. And I’m just going to love myself unconditionally for who I am.

Jane (31:50):

Yes, absolutely. Every person should do that, but is it true? Is that really true? Are you really as happy as you could be maybe in a body that’s not, not as healthy as it could be. No, that’s not true. You know, so you got to own the truth. Or I talked about my dating relationship, coach, client, same thing with her, you know, her whole, her objective in any sales conversation is to get those people, to tell the truth. And she talks to plenty of people who say, well, it’s really, you know, I like being single and it would really be okay if I stayed single forever. Well, that’s not true that I like being single part kind of sorta true, true in a lot of times, but is it true that this person will be happy being single forever? Probably not. Otherwise they wouldn’t be on the phone with her.

Jane (32:34):

So we are space holders for people to tell the truth. You’ve got to get them to tell the truth. They can’t Polly Anna, their way out of the conversation. And that’s something I just made up because that is what people do. Well, you know, it could be worse or it’s okay if I never meet the love of my life and you know, I’ll be okay with it. I can handle it. Or if I, if I just kind of stay in this body that I have, we’ll, I’ll figure out a workaround. So there are plenty of times life where being optimistic and finding the work around and telling yourself it’s all going to be okay, absolutely. 100%. You’ve got to do that in plenty areas of life. And plenty of times a sales conversation is not the time. The sales conversation is the time to just strip everything off and go.

Jane (33:18):

I really want to find my soulmate. I really am desperate to drop this weight and have more energy and look and feel better. I really can’t go another day in this business without getting clients, because I don’t have any more money left and I have to start making it. So that is your job in a sales conversation is to get people to drop the nonsense, drop the facade, drop the feeling like they have to put their best face forward and actually tell the truth. Now here’s what I, this is the linear kind of thought that I preach all the time with my clients. Here’s, here’s the true thing. When you speak your truth, you hear it. And when you hear it, you feel it. And when you feel your truth, you own it. And it is in the moment of ownership of the truth that any of us actually start making decisions to do something, speak your truth.

Jane (34:09):

So when you speak your truth, you hear it. When you hear it, you feel it when you feel it, you own it. And when you own your truth, things will start to change. And I’m actually just going to stop for a second and say that one more time. And then I’m going to give everybody about 10 seconds. And here’s your directive from me. I want you to think about the last time that you told yourself the hard, hard truth, like truth that brought up all the feelings. Even if you were in the middle of the night alone, you told yourself a truth that was so powerful. It made you cry, or it made you acknowledge that there’s there’s shame or embarrassment around it, or it made you sad. You know, I’m talking for a truth that I’m talking about. I want you to identify a truth. That was so powerful that it actually emotionally moved you to a very different place. So I’m going to say it one more time. And then I’m just going to give everybody about 10 seconds. Cause I want you to come up with that. When you speak your truth, you hear it. When you hear it, you feel it. When you feel it, you own it. You own your truth. So pull, pull up the last time in your memory that you told yourself a truth that just kind of knocked your socks off. Cause it was so raw.

Jane (35:29):

Okay. Does everybody have that?

Pam (35:33):

I have that, but I’m not sharing.

Jane (35:35):

No, no, no, no, no, no. Nobody, nobody share. Okay, cool. Nobody needs to share, but this is what I’m talking about. The very fact that you said you have it and you’re not sharing. That’s good because that means it is very powerful. It’s very, very, very deep. It’s very meaningful. It it’s just, it’s it’s a lot. It’s probably, um, probably got you a little shaky Pam. Right? Just even pulling it back up and thinking about it. Like you’re feeling it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You’re feeling it. And I, you know, I came up with my own too and I’m feeling it. And so here’s the thing. Now I want you to take that truth. Imagine talking to somebody who really cares about making sure that you get to that truth and that you own that truth. And now imagine that that person actually has a solution that would get that truth to become something other than it is a reversal of that truth.

Jane (36:27):

The other side of that truth. And now imagine that that person actually facilitates a conversation. So you can get clear on, is this the truth? Do I own this truth? And, and what am I going to do about it? And then finally imagine that this person holds you in this space that we were talking about earlier, this open space of deep love and deep conviction and raw, real honesty. And they’re hearing you, and you were probably being heard in a way that you have never been heard before around this issue. And you feel seen and you feel understood, and this person has helped you bring this truth to the light and suddenly it may not be as awful as you thought it was. Why? Because there is hope that we can get on the other side of that truth.

Jane (37:26):

And then finally imagine working with this person that you’ve been having this conversation with, they can change, you know, and this is why they can help you change. And this is why I get so passionate about sales, because think about this. I mean, this is, this is really kind of heavy, but I truly believe this when we are in, when we are in that space. And when we are having conversations with people, not because we’re trying to convince them to do something, not because we’re trying to compel them to work with us. Certainly not because we’re trying to secure their credit card because we need the money. When we are in the space, we, we are facilitating a conversation where somebody else can get to the truth. And as a result, they get clear. And as a result of that, they start making different decisions to get on the other side of that truth. Guess what you have just done. You have become a partner in their journey and you have become a part of the whole catalyst process for this person to walk away from where they are and walk into what is ultimately the destiny that they’re trying to create for themselves. If I think big stuff, I don’t know what it is.

Pam (38:39):

That’s for sure. Holy Hannah, what a great episode, right guys. So, um, obviously Jane has just a tiny bit of passion for this topic. We couldn’t tell it all right, but sales is so important, but I think it’s so important that you can enjoy it too. Cause I kind of think of it as meeting new people. I love it. Cause I, I am an introvert by nature. Believe it or not. So I need my alone time, but I’m also a super social creatures. So I’m like a walking contradiction, contradiction, but those conversations, I don’t know, totally pumped me up. And that’s what I look at them, you know, it’s not, oh my God, I got a sales call at three. It’s a conversation. Yeah.

Jane (39:27):

Well, I mean, how delicious is that thinking? I have a conversation where, who am I talking to today? Sally Smith. Okay. I have a conversation with Sally today and I’m dying to know what Sally’s truth is. I’m dying to know what Sally really believes about herself in this area and this area being the thing that you do. The thing that yourself, all right, so want to get into the third myth, the finalist. So the final and third myth is that, let me recap first, actually the first myth is that you have to be good at closing. You’re not going to do that anymore. You’re going to get good at opening myth. Number two is that you always have to make an offer. You’re not going to do that anymore. You’re going to vet them. You’re going to have an exploratory conversation. And you’re going to determine, is this somebody I can help?

Jane (40:11):

Is this somebody I want to work with? And the final myth is that you have to impress people by articulating what it is that you do and what it is that you know, and no, you do not do that. So I have kind of bad news for everybody. If you’re sitting down, if you’re driving, don’t wreck the car, you know, but here’s the Snoop. Nobody really cares how amazing you are. And they just don’t. They really don’t. What they care about is how amazing you can help them become as a result of working with you. I’m not saying you’re not amazing. You’re all amazing. And yes, there are plenty of you who you need credentialing and you need certificates and you need a specific education. And all of that is important, but none of it really is as important as them understanding that their lives are going to be transformed as a result of working with you.

Jane (41:03):

So if you think about this in terms of a dentist, let’s say, so say I go into the dentist and uh, I want a better smile. So I’m looking at teeth whitening, or maybe I’m really getting up there and getting the nears. I don’t know whatever I’m doing, but I’m getting something done so that I can have a better smile, which is going to make me feel more confident, which is going to make me more brave about securing bigger speaking gigs, which ultimately will help my business. So that’s what I’m going into the dentist for. I’m not wanting to, where did he go to school and how long was he there and how many people? Yeah, I don’t really care about all of that. You know, I’m going to go in and I’m going to tell him that this is what I need and what I need is it’s me, you know, and we are, we’re all selfish for a reason. And in that kind of situation, that’s not a bad thing to be selfish. So I don’t, I don’t really care about all his fancy degrees and his, whatever he’s got going on. Can he help me, you know, am I going to walk out of there with my mouth looking good? Not his, I don’t care. I mean, that sounds a little hard to hear, but you know what

Pam (42:06):

I’m saying? Because it doesn’t sound harsh to me. I don’t know. I just, it’s the radio station. W I, I F M right. What’s in

Jane (42:14):

It for me. Yeah. 100%. So the worst thing that you can do is actually get really, really good at explaining to people what it is that you do. And even worse is how you do it. So in this industry, what I hear a lot of people do before they start working with me is okay, Pam, this sounds really good. I think you’d be a really good fit. So let me, let me tell you how I work. I’d love for us to work together in a VIP situation. Now this will be a duration of three months. And once every week we’re going to have a call and you’re going to have downloadable modules. And then once a month, we’re going to have a mastermind. So I’m often running into the process and I’m telling you what I do and how I do it. And it just shuts people down.

Jane (42:55):

Why? Because they really don’t care. That’s just the methodology. That’s going to get them what it is that they’re looking for. So, in other words, if the dentist said, you know what, Jane, no problem. So here’s what we’re going to do. First thing we’re going to do is we’re going to ultra. I have no idea how dentist works. I’m making this up, we’re going to ultraviolet Ray, your lights, and then we’re going to take, or your teeth. And then we’re going to take x-rays. And then I’m going to have the, the, my assistant come in and she’s going to really make sure that she cleans everything. And we use an amazing toothpaste that was developed by NASA. And it’s 3.2, one on a riff. Yeah, I don’t care. What I want them to say is Jane, we got it. You know, you’re going to be in here for about three hours. And when you walk out, you’re going to feel like a million bucks, because you’re going to have a million watt smile, and you’re going to be getting on those stages. And you’re going to be flashing those pearly whites everywhere. You are going to be confident. You are going to be happy. You are going to be on fire because you know that you look great and your smile is representing all the happiness that you feel on the inside. Have a seat.

Pam (43:52):

There’s not enough that can be said for that. That’s for sure. Yeah. And, um, I know Jane that you could go on and on because of the passion that you have for sales and Julie, I can’t blame ya. I really love it too. But if you’d like to carry on this conversation, let’s do it over in the flourish and grow Facebook group. If you’re not a member, definitely, um, apply to join. It’s not really an applied to join. We just make sure you’re of the right age and have a business. Okay. Because we want the right people in our group. But I think it’s a great opportunity for us to carry on that conversation. That

Jane (44:30):

Sounds like a great, so just to recap for today, three myths, number one, you have to be good at closing. You don’t be good at opening. Number two, you always have to make an offer. You don’t, it’s a vetting process. You need to make sure that’s what you want to do. And number three, you have to impress people with what you know, and it, and articulate it to them. So that they’re very clear on how you do it. You don’t, you want to explain to them what will happen for them as a result of working with you,

Pam (44:55):

Right? Like we’ve talked about on another episode, focused on the outcomes, not the deliverables, because that’s what people really want to hear about. Yup. Super awesome. People will thanks so much for tuning in and until next time, get out there and flourish. Well, that’s a wrap everyone. Thanks for joining us this week on the flourish and grow to CEO podcast, be sure to visit our website at [inaudible] dot biz. That’s F L O U R I S h.biz, where you can subscribe to the shows in iTunes, Stitcher, or via RSS. So you’ll never miss an episode. You can also find our show notes and resources there too. And while you’re at it, if you found value in this show, we’d love for you to leave a rating on iTunes. Or if you’d simply tell a friend about the show that would sure help us out to now get out there and flourish.

About Flourish + Grow to CEO

What does it take to build a successful business? That’s the question we want to answer for women business owners, so we can flourish and grow together from solopreneur to strategic CEO. Flourish and Grow to CEO is hosted by small business management certified, Pam Ivey and sales strategist, Jane Garee, who share their experiences in business ownership, sales and marketing to help women entrepreneurs scale their business and flourish confidently into the CEO role.

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